Leading a brotherhood of account
This guide is for the man who has read Giving Account and wants to do something about it on Monday. It is not a program. Take what fits.
Starting
- Fewer men, more truth. Three or four men is the right size. Eight is too many for every man to give a real account in one evening.
- Say the agreement out loud first. “We are going to give each other an honest account of how we are actually living, every week, before anyone asks. We will receive each other's accounts the way brothers do. We will not flatter each other.”
- Go first yourself. The first man to give a real account sets the depth for everyone. If he reports a real thing, the others will.
A 90-minute gathering
| Time | What happens |
|---|---|
| 5 min | Open in Scripture. One passage read aloud. No study, no commentary. |
| 20–30 min | Every man gives account. The four questions from the self-report, three to five minutes each, uninterrupted. |
| 30–40 min | The brothers respond. Ask, listen, tell the truth, refuse to flatter, share the weight. |
| 10 min | Pray for each man by name, about what he reported. |
| 5 min | Close with the week. Who is calling whom. What each man will report on next time. |
Ten-week plan
Read the chapter beforehand, open with the passage, give account, then discuss. Each chapter has a free companion page at marksentell.com.
| Wk | Chapter | Open with | Focus |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Hold Me Accountable | Galatians 6:1–5 | What have we actually been asking each other to do? |
| 2 | The Word Itself | Luke 16:1–9 | Where has God made us stewards, and have we reported? |
| 3 | The Oldest Excuse | Genesis 3:1–13 | Rewrite a recent failure as Adam, then as David |
| 4 | Bear Your Own Load | Ezekiel 18:1–32 | What is in each man's pack right now? |
| 5 | Bear One Another's Burdens | Ecclesiastes 4:9–12 | Which of the five do we do; which is missing? |
| 6 | Faithful Wounds | 2 Samuel 12:1–15 | Who has been Nathan to us? Who needs us to be Nathan? |
| 7 | The Silence That Wastes | Psalm 32 | Name the counterfeits we are practiced at |
| 8 | First to Speak | 1 John 1:5–10 | Every man reads his four lines aloud before discussion |
| 9 | The Final Account | 2 Corinthians 5:1–15 | What installment is overdue? |
| 10 | A Brotherhood of Account | Acts 2:42–47 | Adopt or adapt the covenant; decide what happens next week |
Questions that receive an account
Use after a man has finished speaking, never instead of letting him speak. Avoid anything that starts with “Did you” and can be answered yes or no.
Toward honesty
What did you leave out?
Is that the whole account, or the part that was easiest to say?
Toward specificity
What was going on in the hours before?
You called it a slip. Walk me through the decisions.
Toward ownership
Say it again in one sentence, with you as the subject.
If no one had asked you tonight, would you have said this?
Toward need
What do you need from us before Monday?
Who is calling you this week, and when?
Toward pattern
You've reported this three weeks running. What are you not seeing?
What would you say to a brother giving this account?
When a man reports a fall
Let him finish. Thank him for telling the truth. Ask the questions. Tell him what you see, including the hard things. Remind him of the gospel (Romans 8:1). Decide together what happens this week. Do not flatter, minimize, or catastrophize, and do not take his load.
When a man goes quiet
Not in the meeting. Alone, that week. One man goes to him (Matthew 18:15) and says: “Your accounts have gotten thin. I think something is going on. I'm not going anywhere, and I'd like you to tell me.”
From Giving Account by Mark Sentell. The book includes the full question bank, reflection questions for every chapter, and the reasoning behind each practice. marksentell.com